Complaints and Courage

I have a low tolerance for complaining.

Probably too low actually.

Like many leaders I tend to be biased towards optimism and action. I was taught to never bring a problem to the boss without proposing a solution. And I try to be positive most of the time.

I have to make an effort to be curious about why people are frustrated, fatigued, or fed up instead of pushing them to do more or pulling them forward as fast as possible. I need to slow down enough to really understand the things that are making good, committed people struggle.

The reality is, leaders in every charity I work with are deeply tired. Many are overworked. Many are discouraged. Many of our best people are Missing Gears.

Some days you probably are too.

We need to distinguish between the complaints that are fully legitimate, which deserve an active response. The ones that are really driven by accumulated fatigue, which need compassionate care. And those, often few, that are just griping.

Only the last group ought to be seen critically.

One key to discerning the real root of the complaint is to look for the vision hidden within it.

People who are inspired by a meaningful vision rarely gripe about minor things. They may be frustrated with decisions they don’t understand, systems that aren’t effective, people who annoy them, or workloads beyond their ability to handle; but they are ultimately desiring the best for your cause and clientele.

They are still inspired. They just want some help.

It’s important to catch these people’s concerns and address them, as well as you can, while they are still motivated by something they believe in. Before they are too tired to care anymore.

January is a time of new beginnings. You should be reminding your people of your compelling purpose throughout the year but this is a natural opportunity to renew that focus.

Make a point of encouraging (i.e. filling with courage) your team this month using multiple approaches:

-Invite a client or donor to Zoom in to a staff meeting.

-Have your newest and longest serving team members share what inspires them about your work.

-Compile and celebrate your accomplishments from the past year.

-Make a collaborative video or visual project telling the story of your work.

You may just find it encourages you in ways you need just as much.

Responding to complaints with curiosity isn’t easy to do. It takes humility and compassion, as well as time and energy, to genuinely seek to understand what may be behind the frustrations. But your people, and your vision, are worth it.

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