After Your Exit
It may just be in my circles but I’m seeing more leaders leaving charity roles, (whether by their own decision or not), than I can ever recall before.
Fortunately for those departing, the job market is strong and there are roles available. But that doesn’t eliminate the stress and emotion of being let go.
There are lots of good resources for considering the legal aspects of being fired, and that is not my expertise; but here are some practical tips for the first days after being let go.
-Don’t contact everyone you know or post about it on social media for at least a couple days. You need some time for your emotions to settle a little bit so you’re not just looking to soothe a wounded ego. Reach out to a small number of trusted friends and mentors.
-As much as possible, decide now to speak positively of your former organization and leadership. It may be difficult, but not doing so will potentially burn bridges you may want to cross again some day. More importantly, venting your feelings too freely can easily build bitterness in yourself (and in your family and friends).
-But do find a trusted, mature friend or mentor with whom you can share your unvarnished feelings. Complaining, blaming, swearing, worrying, whatever you need to do to process. The person you need for this is one who will meet you where you’re at, but won’t leave you there or add fuel to your fire. Someone who can acknowledge the reality of your feelings and help you make the best rational decisions is the right choice.
-Do the hard work of asking what is true in any criticism you’ve received and commit to addressing it. Let anything else wash away. See the opportunity to learn that is hiding in this hardship.
-Be on guard. Your favourite vices and temptations are likely to be extra appealing when your self-esteem is bruised. Get some support and be wise. Don’t let things spiral.
-Remind yourself of what is most important. Lean into the deepest truths you believe about who you really are. Your work, especially a particular role, is not the fullness of your meaning or value.
Handling any legal issues, developing your strategy for seeking your next job, and connecting with key personal advisors (lawyer, therapist, clergy, employment coach) may all be things you need to do fairly quickly. But you also need to work through your very real feelings and set the course towards a healthy outcome.
These first few days can be very important. Choose wisely.